Look @ Me, Look @ Me!

The Complete And Utter Randomness That Is My Life.

Thanks Adam. July 18, 2008

Filed under: "cool", friends, funny, really? — lianadickson @ 9:07 pm

My friend Adam sent me this e-mail a little while ago.  Normally I hate forwards, but I actually thought this one had some good stuff in it.  Therefore, my gift to you is a list of interesting/funny stuff.  Thanks Adam.

 

JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT YOU KNEW EVERYTHING…

A shrimp’s heart is in its head.

The “sixth sick sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick” is said to be the toughest
tongue twister in the English language.

Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over a
million descendants.

Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.

If the government has no knowledge of aliens, then why does Title 14,Section 1211 of the Code of Federal Regulations, implemented on July 16 1969, make it illegal for U.S. citizens to have any contact with extraterrestrials or their vehicles?

In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.

A duck’s quack doesn’t echo, and no one knows why.

23% of all photocopier faults world-wide are caused by people sitting on them and photocopying their butts.

Most lipstick contains fish scales.

Like fingerprints, everyone’s tongue print is different.

If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.

If you keep your eyes open by force, they can pop out.

In a study of 200,000 ostriches over a period of 80 years, no one
reported a single case where an ostrich buried its head in the sand.

It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.

A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.

More than 50% of the people in the world have never made or received a telephone call.

Horses can’t vomit.

Butterflies taste with their feet.

In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all of the world’s nuclear weapons combined.

On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year.

On average people fear spiders more than they do death.

Ninety percent of New York City cabbies are recently arrived immigrants.

Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are
already married

Elephants are the only animals that can’t jump.

Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

It’s possible to lead a cow upstairs…but not downstairs.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

It’s physically impossible for you to lick your elbow.

The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year
because when it was built, engineers failed to o take into account the
weight of all the books that would occupy the building.

A snail can sleep for three years.

No word in the English language rhymes with “MONTH.” (Bunt?)

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist.

All polar bears are left handed.

In ancient Egypt , priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes

An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

“Go,” is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall.

A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.

Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.

Almost everyone who reads this email will try to lick their elbow

 

The Torture Continues. July 17, 2008

Filed under: ellie-bean, movies — lianadickson @ 8:15 pm

 

STAMPEDE! July 17, 2008

Filed under: family, keith, stuff — lianadickson @ 12:27 pm

 

Okay so maybe not quite a stampede, but there sure are a lot of them.  On our recent trip to visit our families my mom had a garage sale and decided that it would be a great time for me to go through all of my old stuff.  Well these were never mine, but it turns out that someone in our family used to collect elephants and they had a lot of them.  Most of them are pretty old and my mom let me take what we wanted so Keith and I kind of inherited an instant collection.  Keith and I don’t collect anything, but I guess now we’ve started.  It’s nice to be able to start a collection right off the bat with 33 of the items already in our possession.  And since Keith and I are pretty lazy this means that if we never add another elephant to the family it’ll be okay.  I just hope that the Antique Roadshow doesn’t come to town, otherwise I might need to sell some of them to pay of our bills.  Just kidding Mom.

 

I Have The Best Husband Ever. July 17, 2008

Filed under: ellie-bean, keith, movies, sleeep — lianadickson @ 1:16 am

Tonight I had to close at work due to the big Sorbetto unveiling, so that meant that I could sleep in and bring Ellie to daycare later.  Apparently she didn’t get the memo, because she woke up at 6:30.  I remember hearing her and noticing what time it was and thinking, “If I just ignore her she will go back to sleep”.  This rarely ever works by the way.  Please don’t think that I often ignore my child, but that moment when you first wake up I know is when myself and almost every other person on the planet is their most selfish.  Keith and I have discussed that when being woken up against your will, you care nothing about anyone else that may need you to get up and only about yourself and what you need to do to get back to sleep.  So I went back to sleep and my awesome husband, realizing how tired I was got Ellie up, made her breakfast, and put her on our bed with the tray topper from her highchair so that she could eat breakfast and watch her favorite movie The Bee Movie of course, all this so that I could get a little more sleep.  I know that he was probably running late for work because he did this, but he did it to be nice to me.  I feel that I need to include another disclaimer, we do not put our child in front of a movie in order for us to sleep longer or to use as a babysitter.  That being said, it sure did the job today.  I got to sleep an extra hour and Ellie ate all of her breakfast, which rarely ever happens.

 

Sorbetto Is Coming, Sorbetto Is Coming! July 14, 2008

Filed under: work — lianadickson @ 9:14 pm

So the past few weeks have been a little crazy at work.  Tomorrow we are launching a new line of drinks at my store and for the past couple weeks I have been holding meetings, training people, getting people certified, and fielding about 3-5 phone calls a day from my temporary boss (my actual boss is on a leave of absence because his wife had a baby).  Well, tomorrow is the big day.  So big in fact that I think that Howard Schultz himself may be making an appearance in my store.  For those of you who don’t know, and I’m sure that’s most of you, Howard Schultz is practically the god of Starbucks.  I recently met him at a meeting and the way people were acting you would have sworn Elvis walked into the building.  One woman was actually shaking out of nervousness.  Him potentially coming to my store is HUGE!!!  It’s so huge that I spent my whole day freaked out and stressed about whether my store was going to be clean enough or if my employees were going to be friendly enough.  I just kept imagining Howard walking into my store and everyone completely ignoring him.  THAT CANNOT HAPPEN!  So back to the point, tomorrow we launch Sorbetto.  What is Sorbetto? you might ask.  It’s a super-yummy drinkable dessert.  Now you’re not going to be able to go to just any Starbucks and get one.  It’s only going to be served in Southern California, and only at certain stores.  If you have been into a Starbucks recently you may have noticed that some of them have these giant metal machines.  Those are the ones that will have the sweet treat.  So like I said, tomorrow’s the big day, get out and try it.  And for those of you who don’t live in Southern California, you’ll have to wait till next year when it goes nationwide.  Sorry.

 

Night Out With The Huttons. July 13, 2008

Filed under: ellie-bean, food, friends, hanging out, makes me want to scream!, other peoples kids — lianadickson @ 9:43 pm

Last night we went to dinner with our friends Mike and Beth.  The evening started out tame enough with all of the children obeying themselves while they took a ride on the merry-go-round at Shoreline Village.  Then we went to Outback, and after a 30 minute wait the kids all realized they were hungry and started freaking out.  Ellie was throwing crayons and climbing all over me, Jackson was screaming, and I’m not quite sure what Drew was doing but I know that at one point in the evening he was under the table.  While the waitress was taking our order I looked across the table at Beth and said “We are THAT table.  You know the table of people that you see in movies or television shows where the kids are all going crazy, and you can’t imagine ever seeing in real life.  And if you did you would ask for a table on the other side of the restaurant from them.  That’s us”.  She agreed.  Things did get much better once all the kids got their food however, it took so long for us to get our food that they were all done eating by the time ours came.  This meant that I got to enjoy my salmon with Ellie standing on my lap sticking her butt in my neck.  Here’s some picks taken during their “cute” period.

 

 

 

Ooooouch! July 13, 2008

Filed under: Why?!?!, keith, really? — lianadickson @ 9:16 pm

Keith always gives me a hard time because I often forget to apply sunscreen when I am going to be outside for long periods of time.  Here’s why.

You see, when I was younger and by younger I mean anytime before I had a child, I used to never burn.  In fact, I would lay out some Summers almost everyday without any sunscreen on worshipping the god of skin cancer and get super-duper tan.  No more, but I guess that’s probably a good thing because it keeps me from causing my skin any more irreversible damage.  Now if only I would listen to my husband more often.

 

God Bless My Husband And Generous Neighbors. July 10, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — lianadickson @ 8:14 pm

Last night it was my plan to cook dinner for the three of us since I was home all day.  Now I know for a lot of you ladies out there you might cook dinner for your families every night, but in our house it’s usually up to whoever gets home first or whoever has any creative meal ideas.  When it comes to making meals I’m pretty boring.  Keith always gives me a hard time because he thinks that I believe that a meal is not a meal unless there is a meat, a starch, and a veg.  He on the other hand can pretty much go Iron Chef style any night of the week and create something awesome out of whatever random items we have in our fridge and cupboards.  Well last night I was making pasta with tomato sauce and chicken, get it, meat, starch, veg, when Keith ran to Rite-Aid to purchase some juice for our screaming child.  When he came back he had with him fresh basil, zucchini, and cucumbers.  Apparently a neighbor of ours had a basket of veggies sitting on his front porch with a sign that said that they were all organically grown and for people to take what they would like.  We put the basil and the zucchini in the pasta and voila.  Today Keith and I are still alive, so it appears that the veggies weren’t poisonous.  I know I’m probably being a little paranoid, but there’s always that thought in the back of my head that goes “What if this person is just trying to wipe out the whole neighborhood with poisonous veggies so that they can demolish all of our buildings and build one giant one for themselves”.  Luckily that turned out to not be the case.  Here’s some pictures of the Iron Chef himself wearing his favorite hat.  Oh yes, it really does say #1 Papa on it.

 

 

100 Push Ups – Day 2. July 9, 2008

Filed under: working out — lianadickson @ 11:29 pm

So I am in the process of doing my set of push ups for day two, and let me just tell you that I’m a wee bit sore.  It’s not my arms that hurt like I was expecting, but it’s my abs.  I got on the floor to do the first set and collapsed during the first push up.  I’m a tough girl though (sometimes) and I was able to get through them all.  I know that there were a few of you who were going to do this with me, are you all still in?  I don’t want to hear any excuses like “My wife’s having a baby”.  That’s not good enough.  Labor with a first child can be quite long, you’ll have plenty of time.

 

Ellie’s First Baseball Game. July 9, 2008

Filed under: ellie-bean, food, friends, hanging out, keith, outings, work — lianadickson @ 9:41 pm

Last night a bunch of us from my store went to a Dodger game and sat in the all you can eat section.  Now I don’t like baseball, but I do like nachos and the idea of getting to eat as many of them as I want was quite the deal maker in me shelling out $45 for Keith and I to go somewhere where the main attraction is something that neither of us are interested in.  Oh yeah, Keith doesn’t care about baseball either or any other sport for that matter which has worked out quite well for me because that means that I never have to sit through a single torturous sporting event.  We took Ellie with us of course and as soon as we sat down the first thing Keith says to me is that because of where our seats are we need to be careful that if anyone hits a home run that Ellie doesn’t get hit in the face with the ball.  Great, how am I supposed to enjoy my nachos with that kind of pressure?  Anyway, we had a great time even though I spent a lot of time trying to keep Ellie from eating food off the ground.  We did end up leaving after the seventh inning because Ellie began to flip out a little.  Just to prove how little I knew about the game we were at, I have no idea what the score was at anytime during the night, and I didn’t even know who the other team was until about the second inning when I saw it on that big light up screen.  I did however enjoy one tray of nachos, half a Dodger dog, a soda, and a beer.